IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize