when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
