Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
