she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
