i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
