Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
