Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
