ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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