is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
