Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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