Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize