I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
