Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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