well most of my day revolves around power hour
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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