i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize