So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
My vagina is very pro this idea
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
