I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize