If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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