Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Randomize
