There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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