Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize