I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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