forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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