Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

That's when you crack a 10am beer

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(602): View more from Arizona

every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..

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(347): View more from New York

k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(623): View more from Arizona

My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.

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(718): View more from New York

Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn

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(44): View more from United Kingdom

I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud

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(716): View more from New York

Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.

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