Texts From Last Night

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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink

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  (775): Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink http://tfl.nu/sedp
  Replies (3) Good night (543) Bad night (1997)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants

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  (910): so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants http://tfl.nu/bero
  Replies (42) Good night (618) Bad night (11950)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave

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  (203): he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave http://tfl.nu/v07m
  Replies (45) Good night (5556) Bad night (802)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...

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  (973): doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea... http://tfl.nu/umc9
  Replies (18) Good night (849) Bad night (4602)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.

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  (970): I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not. http://tfl.nu/wxss
  Replies (19) Good night (7453) Bad night (923)
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  (310): View more from California

  You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.

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  (310): You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila. http://tfl.nu/3egv
  Replies (3) Good night (3167) Bad night (871)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him

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  (406): Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him http://tfl.nu/av2i
  Replies (2) Good night (1585) Bad night (539)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."

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  (414): I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong." http://tfl.nu/mk9e
  Replies (9) Good night (1985) Bad night (1446)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.

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  (801): There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume. http://tfl.nu/bk3r
  Replies (7) Good night (1383) Bad night (755)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.

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  (816): Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines. http://tfl.nu/u22h
  Replies (1) Good night (1344) Bad night (523)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie

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  (717): Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie http://tfl.nu/cc1l
  Replies (5) Good night (1325) Bad night (284)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins

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  (412): You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins http://tfl.nu/ug6k
  Replies (2) Good night (711) Bad night (331)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel

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  (305): He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel http://tfl.nu/vmu7
  Replies (1) Good night (476) Bad night (245)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.

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  (606): When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up. http://tfl.nu/8sfz
  Replies (3) Good night (717) Bad night (254)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album

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  (313): He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album http://tfl.nu/c2eb
  Replies (0) Good night (508) Bad night (297)

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