yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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