then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
