i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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