I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
