You really coming over, don't trick.
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
