Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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