Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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