Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Randomize
