I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
