For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
