yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
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