I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
