Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize