i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
