Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize