One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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