Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
