NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i used baking grease as lip gloss
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
