Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
