the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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