My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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