She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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