Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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