"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
