Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
