thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
