i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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